The personal front
I see her every now and then. She’s usually happy, all smiles and big hair. Once or twice we’ve actually passed on the scooters and exchanged a greeting and a smile. I try to casually dismiss it, but inside.....inside it’s there. Still. Time will fix things, I know. But......... I miss my best friend. My constant. I miss the fun we had together. I miss those eyes. I miss that walk! I miss scooter hugs. I miss the walks and talks to and from the crags. I miss the silly giggles and laughs. I miss the worrying! I miss the caring, and caring for. I miss the reliability. I miss the knowledge. I miss the energy. I miss the love. I miss her. I’m so angry at times. So disappointed in myself.. I know what I didn't do for her. I’m not sure what I did do for her? I know what I sacrificed to try and make this work. I know the people I sacrificed and hurt to try and make this work. I don’t think she believes or understands that. How we both tried. What we both tried....