Kalymnos Resole

This years trip home, of all of my visits back to the UK, was as poignant as any have ever been. The emotional turmoil of the year so far has left me a bit shell shocked if I’m completely honest with myself.. February, alone and recovering from surgery was particularly bad, though the sunshine helped enormously. That I’ve been able to maintain some semblance of normality in my strange little abnormal world is mostly down to my growing friendship with Pam. She came into my life at a critical time I think, she entered the void, and become someone I feel closer too now, someone I feel I can rely on, as I hope she feels for me.  We all have our issues, our baggage, especially as we get a little older and more set in our ways. She has hers, and oh yes, for sure I have mine, as she is discovering. I hope that as we travel along the road in this nice, easy, relaxed friendship, our understanding and feelings can grow. Throughout my trip home we have maintained contact and...

Ive been in the UK since July 17th. The first couple of weeks were a bit surreal to be honest, climbing in the Lakes, North Wales, and then back in the Lakes again. By surreal I mean, one minuet home in Kalymnos (and remember how small it is), to driving all over the country, hunting for the weather to climb, sleeping in different beds, getting used to driving again, my sisters little car, climbing with Di again... I was definatley a little out of sorts. Now, up in Aberdeenshire again, its peaceful, and homely at my sisters place, all alone while they enjoy the Spanish heatwave. I have time now to watch the news on tv, go shopping in the city, and ‘people watch’. And oh what a sight to behold.... People. Obsessed with possessions, with looks, with cars, with celebrity, with money and let me repeat, obsessed with how they look. Its all fake. Fake tans Fake hair Fake eye lashes Fake eye brows Fake emotions Fake sympathy Fake talking.... When and how did this a happen...

Spending a while with someone that has known me a long time has its advantages. The last few days have been spent with Di Gilbert. We’ve known each other for many years and its been good to spend some time together again. We said goodbye this morning with a hug and that famous ‘Giblet’ smile :) I know that I’m a little out of sorts, have been for a while I suppose, but it gets forced home when someone you know, or more to the point, knows you, tells you that you're not right, you’ve lost your mojo, you’re in a strange place......No mans land. Acknowledging the fact that something is wrong is half the battle, and I do accept that. Finding out what it is that’s causing my loss of ‘sparkle’ is a different thing. At least its good to have friends that feel comfortable enough to tell you!  Di has never been one to hold back!! I really didn’t expect to be in this position right now, single again, in a different country and away from family and friends. What part h...

And it is July 2018. I’m travelling and climbing with an old, good friend, Di Gilbert. I love her, she’s ace, she doesn't mince her words and shoots from the hip! We’ve been friends for years and climbed together often in the past. Obviously our paths have gone in hugely different directions over the last few years, hers to big mountains in the greater ranges, and mine to sunny crags and foreign climbs! (Sic) We spent a grand couple of days in The Lakes, staying with Doctor Clair, a friend of Di’s and a huge thanks to her and her friends (special mention to Alex) for their hospitality. Much appreciated. Good days were had at White Ghyll and Shepherds crag. Now we’re staying with Catrin in North Wales, near Llanberis. Cat is one of Di’s best and longest friends, and I can see why. She too is ace :) After 5 or 6 days together, and 4 days climbing, its clear that the dynamic we used to have has changed a little.... I’m not 100% certain why, but I have an idea. We...

They say you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family... That's very true. I'm lucky, I wouldn't wish to change any of my family. With friends you can choose to accept them as they are and live with their negatives to enjoy their positives... Occasionally friends show us a side of them that we really don't need and can do without. We lose patience sometimes and the negative energy, hassle and aggrovation just needs to be removed. This year things have changed enough for me to realise who I need and who I don't. Who I want around me and who I can let go. Maybe the changes in my life and my mind set have left me a little less willing to put up with people that demonstrate a selfish lack of understanding and empathy, that are friends in name only and conspicuous by their absence in times of need? My view of 'friends' like these has been adjusted, accepted, and the changes to our friendship duly noted... It also possible that my ey...

I see her every now and then. She’s usually happy, all smiles and big hair. Once or twice we’ve actually passed on the scooters and exchanged a greeting and a smile. I try to casually dismiss it, but inside.....inside it’s there. Still. Time will fix things, I know. But......... I miss my best friend. My constant. I miss the fun we had together. I miss those eyes. I miss that walk! I miss scooter hugs. I miss the walks and talks to and from the crags. I miss the silly giggles and laughs. I miss the worrying! I miss the caring, and caring for. I miss the reliability. I miss the knowledge. I miss the energy. I miss the love. I miss her. I’m so angry at times. So disappointed in myself.. I know what I didn't do for her. I’m not sure what I did do for her? I know what I sacrificed to try and make this work. I know the people I sacrificed and hurt to try and make this work. I don’t think she believes or understands that. How we both tried. What we both tried....

It’s been a beautiful day. Again. I spent it at Odyssey sector. It was pleasantly busy there today, not crazy like it often is this time of year... Ron Fawcett was there, Basher Atkinson, Rory, Paul, The American Climbing collage guys were there too. Conditions were awful, high humidity last night had left the rock greasy and dark. Today is April the 24th. I’ve seen folks in the sea swimming, looks like the winters warm southerly winds have kept the sea temperature reasonable. On this day last year I went for a 30 second swim and came out numb! I went to work for a couple of hours after climbing. It’s been very quiet on the shoe front, in fact I think in general, numbers are down, you can see it in the restaurants in the evenings, and on the crags during the day. Currently I’m available by direct contact only, or via those bars and shops that know me and let me know if people have been looking for a resole. It’s fair to say I miss having a shop front and I’m certain I would ...